5 Tips for Crushing your New Year's Resolution
So I’m really not a resolution person. New Year’s has never been a time when I set new goals, because I’ll pretty much just do something whenever I feel like it. But I also think it’s a great time for people who want a fresh start to get focused and plan out what they want to accomplish during the year. And this time it’s also a new DECADE which really has everyone going crazy, either with misery over the last decade or excitement for the one ahead.
And there are typically two types of people this time of year. You either feel terrible about how “bad” you’ve been over the holidays, or you’re just super excited for the year to come. Whichever one you are, if you’ve got your resolution, goal, or word for 2019, buckle up. Because it’s actually NOT about the resolution. Let me explain why with 5 tips that’ll help you reframe your goals with a healthy mindset and lead to you actually accomplishing them this year!
Stop focusing on your resolution.
Sounds counter intuitive, I know. But instead of being so focused on WHAT you want to do, focus on WHO you want to be. Ask yourself, “What type of person do I want to become? What type of habits does that type of person have? What do I want my identity to be?” When you are focused on the OUTCOME, you are much more likely to lose motivation quickly. But when you focus on your IDENTITY, reaching your goals is the inevitable result of coming into that identity.
Let’s say your resolution is to lose weight. I only pick this example because I know many women whose goal is weight loss, and I want to give an example of how to reframe this thought process.
Resolution: I want to lose 10 pounds.
What type of person do I want to become? (Instead of saying skinny, fit, etc, think about what qualities that type of person has.)
Consistent, dedicated, self love.
What type of habits does that type of person have?
Wake up early, exercise, eat home cooked meals, get 8 hours of sleep, use stress management techniques.
What is my new identity? (Take the questions that you answered and describe the person you want to be, but state this as if it’s already true.)
“I’m the type of person that takes time to care for my body in a loving way. I move my body every day at 7:00 a.m. I like to do yoga to relieve stress, I cook more than I eat out, and I go to bed by 10:00 p.m.”
The more you believe this is your identity, the more successful you will be. You will do the habits you want to because it is not just an arbitrary goal, it is who you are.
**I walk you through this process in my free Habit Builder. See end of blog post to get it!**
Make small changes.
If you try to go paleo, exercise every day, and meal prep for 7 hours every weekend, all starting on January 1st, I can just about guarantee that you are going to burn out reeeeeeal fast. The key to ensuring habits are sustainable is to make small changes so that you can implement your new habits daily. James Clear, author of Atomic Habits, says that a new habit should take TWO MINUTES OR LESS.
Did you hear that? 120 seconds is the LONGEST that you should spend while creating a new habit. This is so that you can experience success building your habit, and so it will become a part of your daily routine. He gives an example of what someone who wants to go running every day should do. Instead of starting out day one running a mile, they should just put their running shoes on. Then once that’s a habit, go for a short walk, and slowly increase the activity as the habit becomes more concrete.
I understand this is NOT what people want to hear, because results will obviously take longer to appear. But think about what you’ve done in the past? Has a crash diet or exercise program ever produced lasting results? We’re in this for the long haul, y’all.
3. Show up every day.
This kind of piggy backs on number 2. Making these small changes will only work if you are consistent. I am NOT recommending you go for a run if you feel terrible. But I DO recommend that you put your running shoes on. Or go for a walk around your house. Keep the streak going so that even if you’re not doing as much as you would like, your routine is still in tact.
4. Treat yo’self!
Have a reward in place that you get every time you complete your habit. Because what is more satisfying than crossing something off a list or checking it off on a graph (my kind of reward right there)? Or every day after you go for a walk/run, make yourself a cup of coffee or tea. Or maybe you get to watch one show on Netflix, or check your Instagram. Whatever it is, it does not have to be a big deal, just choose something that you’ll always look forward to. You’ll quickly associate your habit with a positive experience.
If you’re a super nerd like me, you’d probably enjoy having a habit tracker. This can be as simple as a piece of paper with your habit and some check marks when you complete your habit. Or you could get a little more organized and use a calendar or create an Excel spreadsheet. Or it may just be a visual representation. Like every time you finish your habit, you put a dollar in a jar that you get to spend on something of your choice at the end of the year. Anything to remind you of the incredible progress you’re making. (FYI-James Clear has a downloadable habit tracker-and more-if you sign up for his email list!)
5. Be patient and give yourself grace.
These changes do not happen overnight, and it is HARD. So leave yourself love notes or write on your mirror to remind you of your new identity. But whatever you do, DO NOT talk down to yourself if you “slip up” or miss a day. Speak to yourself the way you would speak to a friend who did the same thing as you. It’s okay, you’re doing your best, and tomorrow you can make a different choice. The more negative talk there is, the faster you will fail. Period.
James Clear writes, “Breakthrough moments are often the result of many previous actions, which build up the potential required to unleash a major change”. Your small changes ARE making a difference. Be patient and persevere. One day from now you may not see any improvement, but imagine who you will be one year from now.
I hope these 5 tips will give you the encouragement you need to start your new year off on the right foot. With a healthy, loving mindset around your resolutions. But if you want more resources, please buy James Clear’s book, Atomic Habits. It truly changed my perspective on goal setting, and there is so much goodness inside.
I used many of the ideas from his book to create a Habit Builder for you. It’s called Resolution Jumpstart, and I think it will help you go through the process of taking your resolution, and creating the identity and habits you want to have. Take a sneak peek below, and SIGN UP HERE if you’d like to receive the FREE downloadable Habit Builder.
If you’d like one on one support, please email me and we can talk about coaching that is specifically focused on your goals for 2020.
And if this resonated with you, please let me know! Comment, email, or message me on Insta to tell me what your resolutions, goals, struggles, and obstacles are. How are you going to make sure 2020 is the year of YOU?
