Building a Following vs. Building a Life

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Today I’d like to share some of my deep thoughts* on the social medias.

*not actually deep

Let’s just start out by naming a few pros & cons.

PROS:

  1. Fun

  2. Education

  3. Connection

CONS:

  1. Inauthentic

  2. Waste of time

  3. Promotes negative thoughts

Now listen, I’m not hating on Instagram. I enjoy it as much as the next person. And I’m DEFINITELY not on a high horse about it. Rather, I’m speaking from a place of sincere humility and desire to change in this aspect of my life. These are just some things I’ve been pondering lately, and would love to start a conversation about since it has become such a huge part of our lives.

Building a Following

Nowadays, starting a business has become synonymous with building a following. Millennials, you feel my pain. I started my biz a little less than a year ago, and guess what—I don’t have a “following” *GASP*! And guess what else—I’m good at what I do *GASP*!

We seem to think that because someone has x number of followers, they must be good. They must be able to help me with my problems. And maybe they can! But it’s NOT because of their following, it’s because of their gifts & talents.

Over the course of the last several months, I’ve been trying to be more consistent on social media, because I was told I “should” be posting every day. And I want to share a few things that I’ve noticed.

  • I’ve wasted more time on Instagram than I’d like to admit.

  • The more I’m on social media, the more anxious I am.

  • Technology is hard.

  • Hashtags are the bane of my existence.

  • Most people don’t actually want to support one another.

  • There are few people sharing the good, bad, and ugly—myself included.

I also found that the more I forced myself to post content when I wasn’t inspired, it was obvious. I was literally posting something just to be “consistent”. But I’m done with that. I’m no longer going to post something because I think I should. I want to be a person that you can come to for the pros: fun, education, and connection. And I think the way to do that is just by building my life and sharing the very real aspects of it.

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Building a Life

What’s your “dream life”? I’m a firm believer in the fact that we can change our circumstances. I understand there are certain things that are extremely difficult to overcome, and we will probably need some help along the way. But YOU are in charge of your life, and you’re the only one who can make those changes happen.

However, it can be SO easy to get caught up in the idea of that “end goal”, that we forget to enjoy the pursuit. I’m nowhere NEAR my goals personally or professionally, but I’m already living my “dream life”. In no way is this life perfect, and I’m not saying we have this figured out, but Michael and I created this life by choosing where we live and what we do. Nothing ever has or ever will just fall into our laps—we’re constantly working to BUILD the lives we want. And we’re trying to enjoy the process (home improvement is an area we could definitely work on enjoying more).

One of the easiest and most powerful ways we get caught up in that “end goal” is through social media. We see other people’s “perfect” lives and wonder why that’s not us. And while we can tell ourselves all day long that Instagram isn’t real, at our core we will still have that image in our minds of the person that has more followers, is more successful, is more attractive, has the perfect relationship, etc.

So here’s my challenge for you. The next time you see something on social media that makes you feel insecure, jealous, or angry, ask yourself why? What are your beliefs about that person or idea that are upsetting you? Is it because you believe that certain body types are superior to others? Or because you think your business will never make as much money as so-and-so? I challenge you to get to the root of the issue. Then I challenge you to get off your phone and go start living—because what’s real and matters is the present. I hate to be cliche (and outdated), but YOLO! Start building the life you want and enjoy it, friends.

I choose to not focus on building a following, but building a life. One that’s far from perfect but deeply fulfilling.

I’ll ask again: what’s your dream life? And what’s one step you can take toward building that today?

Lexie GrayComment